Soft Life or Patriarchy?

Hey guys, welcome back to my blog!

Apologies for ghosting you all, I’m aware it’s been months, sorryyy😩Life has been life-ing, you know how it gets. Between procrastinating, starting my third year at uni (I know scary, right) and finding the motivation to get back into writing again it’s been difficult but nevertheless I’m back, I hope you’re all good!!

Based off the title, you’re probably thinking oop ‘Soft life or patriarchy? What’s going on here?’ I promise this isn’t a dig to the soft life girlies, just a friendly debate, something to get us all thinking.

My question is, is soft life designed to keep women depending on men or is it a feminist move that people just can’t seem to get behind?

Before women had fair rights, being a housewife was the norm; looking after the children, cooking for the family, keeping the house all nice and tidy. Women were forbidden to drive, work or even have an education. The way some see soft life, is that we’re reverting back into time, that women are essentially ‘giving up’ their rights and being heavily reliant on men, as they used to.

Is ‘soft life’ a rebranded manipulative tactic to get women to be dependent on men? Why now that women are pursuing higher education that ‘soft life’ is also on the increase? 

https://vm.tiktok.com/ZNdvboTx5/

I understand why there’s backlash surrounding women being heavily reliant on men and not having any financial stability for themselves. Especially a man who could one day leave you and essentially leave you penniless, if he was your only source of income. But one thing that TikToker ‘Lotts’ said that really stood out to me was creating a soft life for yourself first. In this life girlies, we got to put ourselves first, everything else afterwards will align.

I’ve inserted the link of the TikTok if you want to watch the full thing, but later on in her video, she talks about how living a ‘soft life’ lifestyle doesn’t necessarily mean that women don’t have to work whatsoever. It’s still very much possible to live a luxurious lifestyle whilst also working. 

Life in today’s society as we know it has changed tremendously. Women have rights, but most importantly they have a choice. I don’t necessarily think that we’re reverting back into time by choosing to live a ‘soft life’ lifestyle. I think people sometimes forget what feminism means in terms of lifestyles - that we get to choose. Whether it’s having your own business, working part-time, working for a big company, being a working mum, working a 9-5 - there’s no right or wrong choice.

The beauty of feminism is that we get to choose.

So to go back to my point, I am all for soft life. I am all for women being treated like the queens they are😌However, being completely financially dependant on a man is something that rocks my boat a little bit. Live that luxurious life, by all means, but having your own money is definitely a necessity. Don’t let your spouses be your only source of income! I’m pro-soft life, but it’s definitely important to make sure you’ve got a leg to stand on, especially if things were to go wrong.

So to wrap this up, to the soft life girlies reading this, keep being the high maintenance queens that you are.

Thank you for reading and until next time❣️